Nearly one year ago, Eric and Angela Weingrad received a devastating phone call. Their eleven-week-old son, Holton, had suffered a severe head injury and had stopped breathing.
According to Holton’s GiveForward page, under the care of his long-term nanny, the infant had cracked his skull. The cracked skull combined with lack of oxygen resulted in damaged brain tissue, and began what would be the most difficult year of Eric and Angela’s life.
In light of the upcoming anniversary, Eric reflects on the year he is about to put behind him— a year of watching his son experience seizures, blood clots, vision impairment, and heart irregularities.
In a piece on Mom.me, he writes:
“The first thing is that me from last year would’ve slapped me from this year for even hinting at the notion there’s some great, big point to all this. The reality is I’ve learned—and accepted—to be comfortable knowing there isn’t a reason for something this horrific. It’s something that just is. Nothing more, nothing less.”
Eric admits that he refuses to believe that someone, billions of years ago, mapped out this exact occurrence, that this tragedy was predetermined to be part of his life’s journey.
He also admits that someone insisting that “God only gives you what you can handle,” does nothing to lift his spirits. In fact, it makes him angry. And cheated.
From his experience, the age-old sayings, “laughter is the best medicine” and “the best things in life are free,” are false. Laughter, he says, does not cure his son’s extensive health problems, and the tremendous amount of medical procedures required to help treat his son are nowhere near free.
But in the year that’s passed, he’s learned that sometimes, the littlest things — like delivering In-N-Out Burger unannounced — can mean the most. And despite the negativities in the world, love still exists.
“[T]here is more to this planet then what we see on the news,” Eric says. “I learned that this word is filled with love, respect and kindness. When it mattered most people were there for us. And not just family and friends, but strangers. Complete and utter strangers. Thousands of them from every walk of life, every religion and every social economic position.”
This year has taught him that while he believes life is not predetermined, the power to determine his future is in no hands but his own.
He explains:
“We can choose to be sad, to be angry or to be lost, or we can chose to be happy, forgiving and found. The latter is harder but it’s worth fighting for in the end.”
And through all of this Eric has decided that maybe, just maybe, those people who say “God only gives you what you can handle” may actually be right.
The road ahead will be bumpy indeed, but the Weingrad family’s strength coupled with love and kindness of others will help keep them going throughout.
